For years when I worked in corporate America, I thought someone would tap me on the shoulder. You know the tap - the one where a senior leader pulls you aside and says, “You’re ready. We see your potential. Let’s elevate you.” I genuinely believed that if I kept delivering, stayed humble, and proved myself enough times, that moment would come.
It didn’t. What came instead was more work, more responsibility and more “Can you also take this on?” More being the dependable one. And every time I said yes, I told myself the same story. This is building my case. This is showing them I’m ready. This is how they’ll know.
But here’s what I didn’t understand. Doing the job well only proves that you can keep doing the job well. It does not automatically position you for the job at the next level. Having worked in corporate HR, I can confidently tell you that no one is sitting in a meeting secretly tracking how hard you’re trying. Leadership is talking about who is already thinking at the next level, who is speaking up with perspective, and who is solving problems that don’t technically belong to them yet.
That realization stung and I really wish I had worked in HR sooner. I wasn’t waiting for growth, I was waiting for permission. Permission to share my opinion, to take up more space, and to say, “I want that role.” Essentially, I was waiting for permission to stop playing small.
And if you grew up like I did, waiting for permission makes sense. You respect hierarchy (“Respect your elders”); you don’t skip steps (“Why didn’t you get 100? This is not acceptable, beta”), you don’t self-promote (God forbid you should come across as arrogant) and you let your work speak for itself (“They know better, just wait. And also be grateful you have a job”). But here’s the problem - in most corporate environments, silence does not read as humility. It reads as readiness for exactly what you’re already doing.
I remember the first time I positioned myself before I felt ready. My heart was racing and I had rehearsed the sentence in my head at least 20 times. It was something simple like, “I’d like to be considered for projects that have more strategic visibility.” That was it. No dramatic speech. No résumé recap. Just a clear statement of direction. And guess what? Nothing exploded and no one accused me of being arrogant. In fact, my manager said, “Good. I was wondering when you were going to say that.”
BOOM. Brain explosion. That line changed something in me. I had been waiting for her and she had been waiting for me…? WHAT?! How long had she been waiting for? I was just making a lot of assumptions… and waiting. I was assuming they knew, assuming they saw my ambition, assuming my effort translated into intention and I was quietly and respectfully waiting for someone to tap me on the shoulder.
My back-breaking effort didn’t translate, my silent and respectful waiting didn’t pay off and no one tapped me on the shoulder. Positioning yourself is not about pretending you’re already there, it’s about making your trajectory visible. It sounds like asking to be included in conversations that stretch you; it looks like framing your updates in terms of impact, not effort or activity; and it feels like saying what you want before you feel 100% qualified. And yes, it can feel uncomfortable, especially if you’ve been praised your whole life for being agreeable, easy, and low-maintenance. But what’s the alternative? Let me tell you.
If you don’t position yourself, someone else will. Your colleague, a teammate, or maybe even your manager will swoop in and yes, they may be less experienced or less capable than you, but they may also be far more comfortable advocating for themselves - and guess what? They will get the credit for your work and the promotion over you. Sucks right?
The Harvard Business Review study that I shared in my free masterclass last week found that people who visibly share their ideas are 45% more likely to be seen as leadership material, regardless of performance. Think about that. That means that someone with half your skillset who speaks up more than you will be seen as “the next rising leader.” This is not about becoming someone you’re not. It’s about refusing to hide the someone you already are.
Another study found that employees who self-advocate at least once per quarter (read four times a year!) are promoted up to 3x faster than their peers who wait to be noticed. Are you seeing a trend here?
So if you’re currently waiting for the tap on the shoulder, consider this your tap. Not from a leader - from yourself (and from me). Don’t wait for permission, position yourself now.
And if you’re thinking, “Okay… but how?” sit with that. Notice where you’re shrinking. Notice the meetings where you could contribute but don’t. Notice the opportunities you disqualify yourself from before anyone else does.
Start there.
And if you feel so inclined, reply and tell me … I read every reply.
🔥 If you know someone who is brilliant and qualified but waiting to be tapped, this one’s for them too so please forward along. And if you haven’t subscribed yet, join Unmuted here to get next week’s issue. You don't want to miss it!
Minal