(3-4 mins)
Working at Salesforce, I was surrounded by brilliant, talented and incredibly hard-working colleagues. My boss was inspirational, Marc was legendary and it felt like everyone around me had clarity, direction and purpose. They were also cool. They had hobbies and interests and lives outside of work. And while all of this sounds like I was living the dream, for a while, it felt like a nightmare.
When I first started, I felt insecure, dumb and incredibly boring. I was constantly looking up ways to make myself sound smarter, more interesting and much more attuned to the SAAS/tech world. I went down the research rabbit hole. I Googled, I YouTubed, I Reddited. I looked into classes, coaches and certifications.
Not because I needed anything in particular, but because I thought whatever I would learn/understand/become, would make me feel like I belonged more. My imposter syndrome was off the charts and that mean little voice in my head kept whispering, “You need to be more.”
So I signed up for things. Plural. Cooking courses I didn’t finish, dancing lessons I didn’t have time for, cloud platform and SAAS certifications I didn’t need, and one coach that was so misaligned with who I was and how I operated that I just quietly stopped showing up and pretended it was a scheduling issue. I secretly hoped each and every one of these would hand me the missing piece that would finally make me feel legit.
But here’s the truth. I spent a lot of time and way too much money for nothing. None of it made me feel smarter or more confident or like I belonged. If anything, it backfired because it made that mean little voice in my head even louder. Now the bar kept moving and there was always another acronym to learn, another framework to master and another way I should be showing up if I wanted to “keep up” with everyone around me. It felt unattainable and overwhelming - because it was.
And meanwhile, the people I admired most weren’t doing any of this. They weren’t collecting credentials or trying to sound impressive. They weren’t actually trying to do or be anything. They were just comfortable with who they were and confident in what they brought to the table.
Reflecting back on this it makes perfect sense. Growing up in a South Asian immigrant household, education wasn’t just encouraged, it was stuffed down our throats. Degrees meant safety and stability, certifications meant credibility and if you’re overqualified, no one would dare question or doubt you. So when I felt uncomfortable at work, my instinct wasn’t to speak up confidently or own my perspective. It was to go back to what I knew: study harder, prepare more, collect more proof. The irony in all of this was that I already had what I was chasing. I had the insight, the experience and the expertise. I also had the coolest life experiences.
At that point in my life I had lived in Africa, India, Europe and the Middle East and had traveled even more. I could cook, I could dance, I could speak multiple languages and I could tell you about the Maasai Mara in Kenya, where to find the most incredible paella in Madrid and how not to get left behind at the full moon party in Sentosa.
What I didn’t have was the confidence to let myself shine. Looking back, I probably needed therapy but since that also wasn’t a thing in my South Asian immigrant household, I settled for confiding in a few close colleagues.
When I stopped trying to be more and started grounding myself in who I already was, the nightmare I was experiencing started to shift to something more tolerable until it really did become the dream.
So today when someone tells me that they’re thinking about another certification, my first question is always the same: What are you hoping this will fix?
If you genuinely want to learn something new because it excites you, amazing. Go for it. But if you’re using credentials to quiet self-doubt, to earn permission, or to feel worthy of being there, you’re solving the wrong problem.
Take it from me. You don’t need another certification, you need to trust that what you bring to the table already has value and you just need to let people see it. You have to see it for yourself first though. That’s the work. And while it’s definitely scarier and more effort than clicking “Enroll,” the payoff will last for the rest of your life.
So, if you’re currently hovering over an “Enroll Now” button, maybe pause for a minute and ask yourself what you’re really hoping it will give you. And if you feel so inclined, reply and tell me … I read every reply.
See you next week,
Minal